No American elections, no… it’s my Bday!
Today is my Birthday en this is not just another day: it’s the 8th of November. the day that the American elections are. On this day Hillary and Trump are going to win from each other. But not important to me… its my Birthday! And not just another Birthday! No, I am 40 years old now! Yes!!! The BIG 4_0
It started on my 25th Birthday, I worked at the office of yes magazine, I was struggling to become older. And I remember it so good, if it was today. I became 25 and I thought, this is the end of the ‘young era’. The end of doing crazy things. To wear whatever I want. Then people (probably around the 40 years old) were saying to me that I am still young and I still can do so many things.
You know… I never celebrated my Birthday. Yes, when I was at primary school, I really loved it. I was looking forward for my party with al my friends. Alle these gifts. We made autumn walks in the woods of my hometown Schinveld and when we arrived at home there was a lot of great food waiting for us. Then we went to the cinema en visited for 1st time in my life the McDonalds in Limburg in Heerlen. It feels like it’s not so long ago. Probably I was celebrating my 10th birthday. Also a milestone.
When I was at high school, I didn’t organise the Bday parties anymore, no… My mothers birthday was on the 11th of November, 3 days after me. And she always celebrated her Birthday very big. The whole family came and her friends! And on this day I was also celebrating my Birthday. Our birthdays were celebrated with a lot of cakes and the typical pies from the south. (Limburgse vlaaien). But I was never a real party-animal. That’s a bit weird. I am someone from the south, a Burgundian. But being very ‘down to earth’ became even more strong when I left the south and moved to the west.
During my birthday, the past last years, I am always very emotional and melancholy and I have to admit I am always very happy when this day is over. Looking forward to this day, like when I was a child, I haven’t had that anymore. Getting older, it makes me sad. But after the lost of both of my parents, I have to celebrate life. Celebrate that you have another ‘year of life’. And I do realise this very good. Time is so fast, and I will be 80 without noticing and haven’t enjoyed being 40.
On my 40th birthday I still feel the same as being the 25 years young girl. Doing crazy, wearing funny clothes and even fyically I haven’t changed a lot. Yes, some wrinkles, but not so badly that I have to make an appointment at the clinic to get some fillers, botox or other stuff.
Forever young “ You are only old as you feel” you hear everyone saying. And no, I don’t feel 40. I feel as a 25 or 30 or even 35 years old. I am ageless. I don’t have children, so I can be a cild myself. Of course I have my responsibilities, but I am free! I feel free to do, to wear and to say what I want! And this makes me rich, grown up, but because of that forever young!
Last saturday, I thought I was going for diner with another couple in a restaurant. We arrived at the restaurant and I thought I saw some family of my boyfriend, I thought: “such a coincidence” and I realised that this wasn’t a coincidence when my boyfriend started to smile. We got inside, my tears fell down my face because all these lovely people who sat there, came specially for my my birthday. I appreciated it so much, that they took steps to come here for me. And to thankful that my lovely boyfriend has arranged this surprise. And so thankful that celebrating life is a great opportunity to be aware that I already came so far and I can proudly say: yes, I am 40… so what!”